you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
We had to coat check the pizza.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize