Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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