And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
whose parrot is this?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Randomize