Your dad touched me again.
please come you make the beer taste better
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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