so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize