hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
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Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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