uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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