I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize