Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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