Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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