It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize