she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize