yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize