Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize