Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize