i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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