You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize