come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
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