Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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