I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize