do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
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I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
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It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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