Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize