either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize