it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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