I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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