All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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