i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Randomize