I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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