I hate all girls vehemently.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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