There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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