How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize