Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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