Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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