i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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