youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
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just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
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You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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