are you still at the devil's house?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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