I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
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