It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
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