Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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