I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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