he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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