I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
The air was thick with penises
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
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