i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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