i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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