Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
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