Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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