now i know why i became what i already was.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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