How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
These tits shall not be calmed
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize