By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
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I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
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I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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