I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
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